Pop Culture Court Filings
Issue 1
Don’t trust wife guys. Aka, Ned Fulmer and the “Try Guys” drama
The Try Guys are a group of 4 content creators who initially rose to fame online during the Buzzfeed era of the internet. They made hugely viral videos like “The Try Guys Try Labor Pain Simulation,” and “The Try Guys Try Ladies’ Underwear For The First Time” (living for that clarification). When Buzzfeed crashed and burned circa 2018, The Try Guys created their own YouTube channel and production company, through which they continued to post viral videos, host live shows, and publish a New York Times bestselling book. Each of the four guys – Ned, Eugene, Zack, and Keith – have their own quirks and personality markers. Ned Fulmer, who found himself as enemy #1 on the internet this week, made his brand “the wife guy.” In almost every video, he mentioned his wife, his marriage, his kids, you get it. In time, his wife Ariel became involved in the company, appearing in videos and podcasts and even leading spin off videos like, “Moms Try Thirst Traps” and “The Try Wives Get Mammograms.” The couple also visited universities to host “relationship ethics” seminars – BRB, my eyes just rolled out of my head and across the room.
This week, it came to light that Mr. Wife was cheating on his wife with a Try Guys production manager, who happened to be engaged to her boyfriend of 10 years. The company quickly released shitty, half-baked statements (hire D/R) sharing that Ned would no longer be working with the group, having put the company at risk of legal action or worse. The story blew up on social media and was covered in major news outlets.
In any other week, no one would care about this loser, but in the wake of Adam Levine’s cringefest DMs, it’s big news. In the words of @Kayla Ibe, “it’s been a bad year to make a career out of loving your wife.”
Then again, Maroon 5 just announced a Vegas residency, so maybe the bad PR to booming business pipeline is back in vogue.
Leave! Marilyn! Alone! Aka, Blonde drama.
Blonde, a highly-anticipated awardsy film starring Ana de Armas was released today to mass internet outrage. The movie, based on the Joyce Carol Oates novel of the same name, is a non-biographical story that, though clearly about Marilyn Monroe, should not be taken as true Marilyn-lore. Marilyn fans are aggressively pushing back on much of the film’s exploitation of the late star, including fictionalized depictions of her abuse, mental illness, sexuality, drug use, and intelligence. Bottom line -- If you’re looking for a Marilyn Monroe biopic, this ain’t it. If you’re looking for an artsy drama about fame, consumerism, and how we destroy what we covet, look no further than Blonde.
The PR around the film before release was pretty standard, until Ana de Armas said on a press panel that the spirit of Marilyn haunted the set of the movie and that the late starlet would “throw things at the wall” when she didn’t like the way a scene was going. Sure, Jan. The internet and the press (as we know) are fickle, and that one ridiculous story instantly soured the reception of the entire project. The tone was clear – let the woman rest.
The movie, which is 3 hours long and available to stream on Netflix, has been called “disgusting,” “cruel,” and “traumatic.” Which, if you ask me, is some of the best PR an artsy movie can get. After all, critics and audiences are using every word to describe this movie other than one – “bad.”
Come on Malibu Barbie Paytas-Hacmon, let’s go party.
Trisha Paytas is an internet personality and self-titled “troll” who has held a firm chunk of virtual real estate for over 10 years. I myself have been watching her videos since middle school, which has undoubtedly had a permanent and lasting effect on my psyche. She’s outlasted her many dramas and cancellations – which range from “coming out” as a chicken nugget and pretending she’s never heard of Hitler, to more serious accounts of racism, antisemitism, transphobia, and literally every other imaginable offense. If we experience nuclear war (which is like, suddenly a concern, but too heavy for this newsletter), Trisha Paytas will not only survive, but will likely play a pivotal role.
I would hate to waste more word count on Trisha Paytas, but the news here is that she had a real human baby and named it Malibu Barbie – a name that will follow that child forever. This broke the internet, but largely due to the fact that Paytas’ pregnancy had already been trending. Just minutes after the passing of Queen Elizabeth II (yes, there is a connection here), TMZ falsely reported that Paytas was in labor. This prompted everyone with a Twitter account to crack jokes about “the queen being reincarnated in Trisha Paytas’ baby.”
Paytas came back with the statement of the year, a TikTok titled “Storytime: I did NOT rebirth the Queen of England.”
Other pop culture tingz that I care less about and will not elaborate on as the curator of this newsletter.
If you blinked, you may have missed the Andrew Tate chapter of the internet. This Buzzfeed article details that situation better than I can. Basically he’s a highly influential piece of misogynist scum who was quickly banned from every corner of the internet, but not soon enough. Trigger warning: men who use the word “alpha” in earnest.
Our new favorite thing is watching famous people touch old things --there’s a joke in there somewhere. Earlier this year, you’ll remember, Kim K wore Marilyn’s historic gown to the Met Gala. Now, Lizzo linked up with the Library of Congress to play James Madison’s 200-year-old flute.
Don’t Worry Darling is out – if you’re into spoilers, I wrote about the twist ending for Cosmo.
My closing statement today is not a statement, but a link to the best video I watched this week – a New York Times video titled “How to Feed NYC's Largest Middle School.” If you have 12 minutes and want to feel your heart grow 12 sizes, watch this.
TTYL XOXO
Court is adjourned.
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